I admit the only times I have seen today’s words used incorrectly is in bathrooms or children’s writing, but is a bathroom notice less important than any other business communication?

Putting up a notice in your public bathroom as part of a policy of keeping them clean and pleasant for all users is fine and can communicate more than the words on the paper. However, a very different message can be conveyed with signs like:

Please keep your hares out of the basins

and graffiti replies such as

Then provide some rabbit hutches for us

But hairs are ok in the basins?

So for the sake of all of us using public bathrooms with hair issues, here are today’s definitions.

hair [noun]: a long protein fibre produced by animals (mostly by mammals) from follicles in the skin. Humans consider head hair as part of our appearance whilst hair is important for warmth and survival in many other animals. Similar strands (such as on plant roots) are also called hairs.
Jenny brushes her hair every morning before leaving her room.

hare [noun]: a mammal belonging to the genus Lepus, similar to rabbits
The hare is related to the rabbit but does not have burrows for its young and is generally larger.

My tips for remembering which is which – hares are like rabbits while hair is in the air.